Eternal Bliss

Sunday

DRIVE ME NUTS


A=accelrator
B=brake
c=clutch
Those were the first letters,i learnt in my childhood.Coming from the family of car freaks ,where CARS are considered 2 be more human then the shallow mortals, and where MICHAEL SCHUMACCHER is displayed with the likes of all holy saints (if my mom is allowed she would definately like to indulge in 2 AARTY CEREMONY for him every day) ,these were the basic mantras of existance.
I dont know who is more impressed by whom, my father with his BALLILAAS or AMITABH with his BASANTY but def inately there is an attraction strong enough to rock any volcano, pulpating between papa and his FIRST love.He pampers his cars more thn he ever pampered his wife.
SO blessed with such environmental passion for driving and cars i couldnt wait to put my hands on wheels, and experience the rush of adrenaline. U guys just cant imagine how i craved for the moment...
Anyways 1 day i approached my bro and in the most honeyed voice i ever could muster i called him
bhai.....(he didnt realize it was him im calling cuz of sudden rush of love and sweetness in my voice)
my sweetest bro....(i mumbled again ..2 no avail)
grrrrrrrrrr ammirrrrrrrrrr......(i shrieked, this time he looked up frm the HOLY BOOK ABT CRICKET)
ARE you talking to me seb?
yes ..obviously i dont remember mom giving birth 2 ur twin and giving him the same name as yours.
tell me that earth is shattering ...or saddam hussain is back for his pound of flesh or sharukh is selling QULFI outside our house? whts the reason of soo much sweetness in your voice?
i wanna learn how 2 drive.....(i unraveled the suspense)
u want what?
driving
what?
d--r---i--v--i---n--g
yeah u drive me nuts..... all the time what do u wanna learn now?(he chuckled)
grrrrrrrrrrrrrr .....................
( ANYWAYS with all the threats and promises dangling on his head, acceptance was the better part of valour .and he then said
ET TU SHYLOCK!...DOST THOU TOO WANT THY POUND OF FLESH!........................THEN THOU WILL GET IT!!!!!!1.
next morning i was awake before the saath waloon kaa murghaa and was hovering on his head at 5 am in the morning.
its time bro wake up !
time for what?my time 2 have a meeting with GOD oh know cant be?
no time 4 sm driving lessons
after a lot of sycophancy and threatening i menaged to drag 1 sleepyhead to the car.
I sat on the driving seat, and could feel the rush of excitement,adrenaline shooting 2wards my head.I could imagine that, why this male specie is so possessive abt there cars and why they think that there cars r there prized possession.and how difficult it is for them to exchange there throne with us girls .
Anyways
A =ACCELRATOR
B=BRAKE
i remembered the holy mantras and while chanting these ishlokes i started the engine 1 nasty growl and it ws dead and 1 deadly look by my bro and i was ALMOST dead. I started again and after 4th try he(engine) finally had mercy on my poor soul so it started ...
WHAT NOW?
put the car in gear D and push the accelrator slowly........(it ws automatic transmission).
i swear i did that but nuthing happened after lots of fitful tries and murdering glares finally the car lurched ffwd
BINGOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
In my excitement i hit the accelrator soo hard and like a rocket it defied the gravity of earth and we went up sorry went ahead and out of nowhere, i promise it wsant there before in my past 18 years of existance a TREE popped up
BRAKEEEEEEEEEEEEE ..HIT ON BRAKEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE U FOOL
i tried to find brake, but to my dismay i couldnt find anything hard underneath my feet so tried to find tht thing called break and in this confusion i hit the A fr accelrator so hard
thud....screachhhh bhommmm ...bahhhhhh,thuuuuuuuuuddddddddd
these were the voices i heard the result of the collision A CLASH OF TITANS between the car and the stupid tree.
my head was exploding trying to find smthing heroic and courageous to muster but couldnt find anything like that so i cried.....
goshhhhhh ...the tree menaged to hit us ...we r being hit......(i started screaming and as usual lost control on my grammer)
no the tree didnt hit us!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! damn u !!!!!!!!!!!!u are the 1 who banged in to the tree ...what the hell u think u were driving some STAR WAR SHIP ???????????????(wrds were coming out in puffed breaths from his mouth).
i started crying with more emotion and devotion somebody came and asked him
what happened and why are you scolding the poor kid what did she do ?
nuthing...... she didnt do anything !!!!!!!!!the tree ran towards us.......... and banged itself in to our car ...and i happen 2 b the CARETAKER OF NATURE ....so was just mourning for the martyr(in a crisis like that his wits turned razor sharp...i couldnt help enjoying).
anyways now the biggest issue at that moment was how to avoid the cops cuz its a serious offence to learn driving without the LEARNERS LISCENCE so my dear brother literally had to bow down to ppl gathered around us to keep there mouths shut .and thn we came back home after the debacle.:(((((((
Needless to tell u guys that what happened afterwards ........shhhhhhhhhhhh ....all of u girls can imagine how mean brothers can get .......
After a year of this nightmare i finally enrolled my self in 2 the driving school and had my liscence(thats another horror story which i will narrate sm other time)and now i drive with all the devotion and passion.And each time i hold the steeringwheel in my hands i feel the same kind of excitement and thrill rushing through my veins .

SO THAT WAS HOW THE COOKIE CRUMBLED.......

















Posted by sebia :: 11:18 PM :: 64 Comments:

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